do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
