Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
