My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
