the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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