i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
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Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
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I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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