don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
we should paint friendship bongs
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