I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize