yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
He? As in you personified your dick?
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Randomize
