I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Randomize
