Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
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