is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
