Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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