there was a trapeze. enough said
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize