I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
