butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
You don't make any sense
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