Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize