I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
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