it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
