I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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