He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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