Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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