lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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