I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
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