I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
