i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize