apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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