can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
