You made me cry and you don't even care
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
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