it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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