So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
