...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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