when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
then he tried to convert me to islam
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Enjoy the penises
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
