Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Randomize
