chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
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