I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize
