Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
