so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
