After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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