I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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