just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Just cropdusted the office
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Randomize