im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
