Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
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