On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
