It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
