the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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