went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Randomize
