All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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