this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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