No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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