i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Such a big mess for such a small penis
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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