I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slut skills are useful in every country.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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