Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Randomize
